Breathe

Hey everybody and Hau’oli Makahiki Hou ie. Happy New Year!!!

I’m 3 days away from leaving the UK to go to Hawaii. GAAAAHHH!!!! This is so crazy. I don’t even know where to begin. How do people do this? Blogging I mean. I guess I’ll figure it out.

My emotions are a mixture of excitement and fear. I’m obviously excited about the fact that I’m going to do a Discipleship Training School  in Hawaii (Kona is the Headquarters for YWAM). But I’ve also got this fear of disappointment. I’m afraid that there will be a sudden change. That God will all at once just decide to put me somewhere else and not send me to Kona for some unknowable reason.

This is based on an experience I had of deep disappointment when I didn’t get through to Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry (for the second time). It was a really difficult time to try and understand why I couldn’t have this one thing I had wanted for a long time. In the end, I surrendered to God and not to bitterness. I decided to keep my heart soft and my eyes fixed on him. I decided to keep on listening to him.

After I received an email saying I wasn’t going to Bethel, I was recommended YWAM by a good buddy called Matt Lewis (HOLLEERRR, great guy). I’d recently talked to a girl who had done YWAM in Kona and my thought was that it sounded amazing there. Not for the lovely setting, but for the wealth of experience that a DTS had to offer, especially at Kona, YWAM’s headquarters.

I later thought that doing a DTS was not on the books. It was for one thing very expensive. It was also difficult for me to see how I would benefit from it. It was proud of me but I thought that I had sufficient Christian ministry experience already. Bethel had felt like a place where I could grow tons and I felt it was more of a challenge. However wrong I was, I thought that a DTS didn’t offer enough spiritual growth to merit going for it.

Then I prayed. In the summer of 2016 I asked God about this and I felt him say ‘Apply to Kona!’. I was thrilled but also wary. This was a big directive and I needed confirmation. I won’t go into all of it but for a month or two I saw Hawaii everywhere. And NOT because I was looking for it. It was genuinely in so many things. It was in TV, posts on social media, movies, dreams, etc. I asked God again and again and he still said ‘Apply to Kona’.

So I did. And he is still signposting Hawaii even after getting accepted by YWAM. I still feel his approval with this decision.

I have got all my tuition fees accounted for ($4000 worth) and I’m still praying for the outreach fees to come in ($4000-6000). God can and will do it! I believe it!

So now you’re up to speed, it’s time to breathe in and take the plunge. My next post will be from Kona, Hawaii!

Aloha Nui Loa! (All My Love)

 

 

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